Gwangi Valley - Lost Blog of the Gwangi

P.Z Myers, a scientist, professor at UMN and noted stirrer-upper of shite with the religious right, is embroiled in a bit of a… difference of opinion with some very itchy Catholics. But let us talk about cows for a second. Sacred ones.

A sacred cow. I doubt anyone reading this has not heard the term. It’s derived from the practice of treating cows as sacred animals in some religions. The phrase has come to mean something which is considered off limits and unquestionable because of someone’s religious beliefs. It’s one of the more superior examples of ‘political correctness’, but you’ll rarely hear those who bash being ‘P.C.’ talk about it. It’s a sacred cow, after all.

The cow to Hindus. The name or likeness of Mohammed to Muslims. Catholic communion wafers… Wait. What?

Yes, a Catholic communion wafer is at the heart of P.Z.’s current shitestorm. It seems that a young man at UCF went to communion and, instead of swallowing the eucharist, spirited away his communion cracker… and some of the peaceful, Jesus-following congregation went medieval on his ass. Apparently they believe that, once blessed by the priest, it literally becomes the body of Christ. And they want their saviour’s body back. Even if it is just a cracker.

Myers made some less than solemn remarks about this, admittedly ridiculous, situation and got himself on the end of the same whoop-ass stick as Mr. Cook, who didn’t swallow, did. When the church found out that the man had not swallowed the sacred Christ cake, they cried out like… well, like someone had butchered a sacred cow in the vestibule. And some of the peaceful, Jesus-following faithful even had the peace-bringing notion that threatening to kill Mr. Cook was the answer to WWJD. And, apparently, Myers has now received a handful of threats of bodily harm as well from some lambs of god.

Over a cracker. A wafer. Noted blowhard Bill Donohue spun up his hyperbole engine and blurted out that the man’s “taking the Body of Christ hostage–regardless of the alleged nature of his grievance–is beyond hate speech…” I shit you not. Donohue, an apologist in every sense of the word, is even calling for Myers to be ‘fired’ from UMN (Myers is a tenured professor, so… dream on, Bill).

And what was the young man’s nefarious purpose? According to him, “When I received the Eucharist, my intention was to bring it back to my seat to show [a friend he'd brought along to mass]…”

All I can think about, however, is how I can find out how many of those who are up in arms over this missing bit of transubstantiated Jesus flesh were also out talking about how crazy those Muslims got over those cartoons or that teddy bear named for their prophet. Or maybe they make jokes in the grocery about Hindu cow patties as they buy hamburger. I can’t help thinking that it was a fair few of them. And the parallel is totally lost on them, I further suspect.

It all looks different, it seems, when the sacred cow is yours.

Ella

A link to P.Z.’s original blog post and to two hyperbolically headlined stories.

It’s a Frackin’ Cracker
‘Body Of Christ’ Snatched From Church, Held Hostage By UCF Student
‘Body Of Christ” Returned To Church After Student Receives Email Threats